You had the bore fest that was the Elite League awards show; be honest how many of you enjoyed that? Having sat through one of these beforehand, I was so glad I found the bar afterwards. It's definitely as much as a snoozefest as the third/fourth place game, but don't get me started on that one.
Now
it's time for the unofficial Frozen Steel awards for the 2015-16
season, purely fueled by my own decision making. Agree then fantastic;
don't agree - well that's tough as my opinion here is just my own. Put
the tuxedos on gentlemen, ladies glam up your poshest frocks, it's time
to hand out some awards:
BEST NETMINDER OF THE SEASON: The winner is Cardiff Devils and Swinton's number one, Ben Bowns.
Bownsy has had another sensational season, his second in South Wales.
In that time, he's become an international regular and GB's number one
goalie. If any player in Cardiff deserved a winner's medal, Ben was one.
He didn't deserved what happened in front of him in the POFW semi-final
against Coventry.
BEST BRITISH DEFENCEMAN OF THE SEASON: One player for me, and I am gonna surprise you here and that's newly acquired dual national - Evan Mosey
of the Nottingham Panthers. See you though I was going to say Ben
O'Connor, weren't you? Dual Nationals count to this, and any other for
that matter so stick that in your proverbial pipe and smoke it. Nah;
seriously Mosey has been top drawer this season and Panthers fans will
be delighted he's staying for another two years. I'd love him in orange!
BEST DEFENCEMAN OF THE SEASON: Ooh tough decision here, but it's going to be Andrew Hotham of Cardiff. Exceptional defenceman who is such a threat to any opponent. He's the supreme import offensive defenceman in the league
at the moment, and you can see why Andrew Lord was happy to retain his
services this season just gone. If Devils can retain him for a third
season, expect him to put some more huge numbers next year.
BEST BRITISH FORWARD OF THE SEASON: This was a difficult decision to make as not many British forwards have a huge impact this season, all have had a season where the imports have outshone them. In fact no British forward features in the top 30 goalscorers for the league for all your stattos out there. So I'm going to plump for the first name that does, which means it's an award to David Clarke of the Panthers. If only we had him on the powerplay with that one-timer instead of stopping it...
BEST FORWARD OF THE SEASON: If I made my decision on points accumlated then I'd be going for Joey Martin of Cardiff here, but I am not. Tyler Mosienko and Levi Nelson have both had good seasons in Steelerland but I am plumping for Matt Sisca of Manchester Storm in this category. For a complete unknown, Sisca was one of the players in a Storm jersey that really impressed me and 34 goals in 61 games is some impressive feat. Only Guillaume Doucet scored more, and that was by one.
COACH OF THE SEASON: Normally this would go to the coach of the League Champions, but not here. Neither is it going to Corey "I'm going, no I'm actually staying" Neilson whom Gary Moron believes is the best in the League; he's actually the best you've ever had Gary - nothing else but. So who wins this? I'm choosing Riley Emmerson of Edinburgh Capitals here (I'm sure CapsBanterArmy will be pleased). Why? Anyone who keeps battling on with fate dealing bad luck constantly deserves this.
BEST BRITISH FORWARD OF THE SEASON: This was a difficult decision to make as not many British forwards have a huge impact this season, all have had a season where the imports have outshone them. In fact no British forward features in the top 30 goalscorers for the league for all your stattos out there. So I'm going to plump for the first name that does, which means it's an award to David Clarke of the Panthers. If only we had him on the powerplay with that one-timer instead of stopping it...
BEST FORWARD OF THE SEASON: If I made my decision on points accumlated then I'd be going for Joey Martin of Cardiff here, but I am not. Tyler Mosienko and Levi Nelson have both had good seasons in Steelerland but I am plumping for Matt Sisca of Manchester Storm in this category. For a complete unknown, Sisca was one of the players in a Storm jersey that really impressed me and 34 goals in 61 games is some impressive feat. Only Guillaume Doucet scored more, and that was by one.
COACH OF THE SEASON: Normally this would go to the coach of the League Champions, but not here. Neither is it going to Corey "I'm going, no I'm actually staying" Neilson whom Gary Moron believes is the best in the League; he's actually the best you've ever had Gary - nothing else but. So who wins this? I'm choosing Riley Emmerson of Edinburgh Capitals here (I'm sure CapsBanterArmy will be pleased). Why? Anyone who keeps battling on with fate dealing bad luck constantly deserves this.
PANTO VILLAIN OF THE SEASON: Only one winner here folks, and he secured this award in the penultimate week of the season. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Boris Valábik of the Coventry Blaze. To say I've seen milk turn quicker than the giant Slovak is probably the nicest comment I could actually bestow on him. The sight in mid March of a lino pushing him off the ice was just pure gold. Boris picked up 346 penalty minutes (and sorry Blaze fans, if you look at the Desbiens incident: the intent is there) this season which proves this partial sentence rings true from his Elite Prospects profile, "...sometimes takes too many unnecessary penalties." So what did he do to get 80 games in the NHL? Head scratcher that..
and finally...
COMEDY MOMENT OF THE SEASON: Looking back on the Douchebag of the Month awards I kinda handed out this season, one stands head and shoulders above them all. It's going to go to SAS and the baggage handlers at Heathrow Terminal 2. Whilst SAS were great for me during my mid-season trip to Estonia, doing everything to make sure I got my connection in Copenhagen after unexpected delays coming out of Tallinn, they were not so great for the league's premier official Tom Darnell. Collectively, they managed to mislay Tom's bag on his way back from Denmark and cause him to miss officiating on a Steelers-Panthers game.
So there's your awards everybody. Just don't take these serious though, it really is a bit of fun and a lighthearted look at the Elite League. Seriousness will be frowned upon.
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